i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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