I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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