Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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