yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
