It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
