i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
