Already got asked if we're dating
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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