When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
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