You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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