Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
