they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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