i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
