Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
