If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize