2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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