whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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