Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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