it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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