I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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