Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
