Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
