We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
