high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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