In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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