Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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