I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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