Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
