two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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