I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
