Please, let me fuck your mom
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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