Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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