But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm sobbing to NWA
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
