Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
