i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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