don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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