They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
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