Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize