hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
