New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
