He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
