if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
