did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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