did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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