I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
