does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize