I'm so fucking centered right now
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
