i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
