Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I lost the right to judge tonight
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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