I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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