is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
